WASHINGTON, D.C. – A newly uncovered General Services Administration (GSA) report has revealed that Michelle Obama has been receiving a mysterious $122,000 per month from the federal government since 2009. While the payments were initially marked as “Services to the Nation,” a deeper investigation has revealed the incredibly bizarre reasons behind the expense.The Official Explanation: “National Morale Maintenance”According to GSA officials, the payments were essential to maintaining American morale, and Michelle Obama was compensated for her “invaluable contributions to the well-being of the public.” These contributions includedProviding America with the illusion of healthy eating while secretly ordering Shake Shack three times a week.
Setting an example for proper bicep flexing so that citizens wouldn’t be “intimidated by strong women.”
Serving as an emergency “Cool Mom” consultant for teenagers needing an excuse to get out of family events.
When asked if this was a normal government expense, a GSA spokesperson simply shrugged and said, “Compared to some of our other spending? Absolutely.”
Related Posts
Air Traffic Controllers Union Boss Blasts Schumer, Dems For Prolonging Shutdown
President Nick Daniels of the National Air Traffic Controllers Association warned Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer and the Democratic Party that the ongoing government shutdown is posing…
Bomb Threats Close New Jersey Polling Centers As Voting Begins
Across New Jersey, bomb threats at multiple polling locations have prompted closures and relocations, several reports noted on Tuesday. Attorney General Matthew Platkin said law enforcement responded to emailed bomb threats…
Barack Obama Makes Big Move Hours Before Polls Close in Key Race
Zohran Mamdani, a proud socialist and Democratic nominee, tried to dismiss former President Barack Obama’s refusal to endorse him over the weekend, only one day before one…
Husband Asks For Divorce After Receiving This Photo
James, away at a seminar, yearned for his wife, Rachel, and to bridge the distance, he asked for a photo. Rachel, grappling with loneliness and self-doubt, hesitated…
Rumors Ramp Back Up Over Barack, Michelle Obama’s ‘Crumbling Marriage’
Barack and Michelle Obama continue to face persistent rumors about troubles in their marriage, despite efforts to keep their private life tightly guarded. RadarOnline.com has gathered every…
Chicago Mayor Says City Will ‘Rise Up’ If Trump Sends Natl. Guard
Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson sharply criticized President Donald Trump over the weekend, warning that if the administration deploys the National Guard to the city as part of…